Predict Your Love Life
Take the Quiz!
by Laurie Puhn, J.D.
IT’S NOT WHAT YOU DO... IT’S WHAT YOU SAY says Laurie Puhn, author of "Instant Persuasion: How to Change Your Words to Change Your Life," Harvard attorney, family and divorce mediator, TV host of “i on New York” and regular Fox News Channel relationship communications expert.
Do you unintentionally shoot verbal grenades during the day to create battle fatigue at night?
Find out so you can change your words to change your love life!
QUIZ: Do you make these comments to your honey?
1. “Whatever you want is fine with me.” Yes/No
Surprisingly, this comment is a verbal grenade. Your mate asks, what do you want to do on Valentine’s Day? and you say, “whatever you want.” You then end up at the Italian Restaurant you absolutely hate.
LOVE TIP: Avoid the "whatever" bomb. Be involved. Ask for what you want to get what you want. Your mate is not a mind-reader. Helping with decision-making during the day stirs romance at night.
2. “You don’t know what you are talking about!” Yes/No
A sure romance buster. Don’t fight to be right and expect love at night.
LOVE TIP: Agree to Disagree about opinions or go check the fact in contention.. Saying “you could be right” is a powerful aphrodisiac!
3. “You never help me with anything.” Yes/No
This is a hot button comment. You put your mate on the defensive and set yourself up for a “ping-pong” argument that consists of a “Yes I do help you!” “No you don’t!” marathon.
LOVE TIP: Be specific. Offer a concrete solution. Say “I have a lot of responsibility around the house and I would appreciate your help. Can we share the laundry - you do it one week and I’ll do it the next. Okay?” The couple who solves together…. plays together.
4. “You never say anything nice to me.” Yes/No
Criticism is a love demon. Focusing solely on what’s wrong, not right, opens the door to a fight. Your mate will reject your comment… and you.
LOVE TIP: “ Punch with a smile.” Make it a verbal habit to give your honey a compliment before any criticism. Find and say what’s right before you state what’s wrong. Say, “You look great in that suit, but a blue shirt would look better.” “Thanks for going to the supermarket but you forgot to buy milk.” Always balance criticism with praise to spark your love life.
5. “You never listen to a word I say!” Yes/No
So you think it’s your mate’s fault that he or she never listens to you? Wrong. It could be your fault for opening your mouth at the wrong time.
LOVE TIP: Before you begin talking, “get a green light.” Say to your honey, “this is important, is this a good time for you?” If he/she looks at you and says yes, then dive in. If it’s a no, then ask, “when is a good time?” Nail down a definite time to talk and make your approach. Doing this will put you on the runway to love.
LOVE LIFE QUIZ PREDICTIONS:
0-1 Yes’s – Congratulations! You’re a Love Booster. You are saying the right thing at the right time to set yourself up for a spicy love life. This Valentine’s Day could be one to remember!
2-3 Yes’s – You have the capacity for a fulfilling love life, but it’s not as good as it could be. You need a verbal tune-up. You must learn to limit those verbal grenades to no more than 1 a week to boost your love life.
4-5 Yes’s - You’re a love disaster. You need a total verbal makeover. You suffer from “foot in mouth disease.” You must “tune-in” to your daily comments and turn them off to “turn-on” your special someone.
FOR MORE FUN QUIZZES CLICK HERE
Learn the top 35 communication do's and don'ts by reading the best-selling book "Instant Persuasion: How to Change Your Words to Change Your Life" by Laurie Puhn, J.D.